


Secrets

by Sailorzeplin



Category: Video Blogging RPF
Genre: M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-02-11
Updated: 2019-02-11
Packaged: 2019-10-26 09:16:07
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 921
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/17743118
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Sailorzeplin/pseuds/Sailorzeplin
Summary: Thanks for reading :){please don't show to anyone mentioned in this fic}





	Secrets

Secrets were a normal part of life, James supposed one night. He was laying in bed, phone open to Alex’s Instagram page. This was relatively normal, he’d go and leave some dickhead comment, or just type ‘beans’ if he wanted to really send the comments wild. Normal, really. But the small flutter in his heart when he looked at the pictures of his friend were not normal. Those were new. But genuinely, they weren’t that surprising. He’d known he wasn’t all that straight for some time now, a nagging little thought at the back of his mind. Why he hadn’t told anyone, he didn’t truly know. They’d be accepting of him of course. There’s no reason for him to not say it. But as his stomach filled with butterflies as he looked at another picture of Alex, he decided that secrets are healthy, there’s no need for everyone to know everything about yourself. And he satisfied himself with that, putting the phone down, tamping down the idea that his reluctance had to do with anything else.   
~  
When he finally told people it wasn’t on purpose. He was still slightly drunk from the night before, soft colored bruise forming on his neck, placed there by someone he had taken home from the club. A guy whose name he had forgotten, who had left a glass of water and a packet of Advil on the nightstand with a note thanking him for ‘a great night xx’ that James had thrown away. But he was sprawled out on the couch of Alex’s flat, Will in the kitchen helping George make tea, Alex on the floor scrolling through his feed. And when George walked in, glancing briefly at his neck before making an offhand comment about how “you guys can’t mock me for hickies anymore now that James has some” causing Will to shout about how ladies were always marking them up, James didn’t hold his tongue.   
“Actually was a bloke who marked me up this time, so I don’t think you ‘ave that in common with me George, unless your comments about Alex are true.”  
He hadn’t even realized it would be his first time bringing up the fact that he was a little gay, but when they all stopped what they were doing, before clambering to ask as many questions as possible, it dawned on him that he had just come out. That thought made him smile, and he answered the questions about his sex life with vague hums and waving of hands, too busy thinking about what this all meant.   
~  
He hadn’t meant to kiss Alex. Or maybe he had. He couldn’t remember, as he pushed him up against the wall, crowding him in. Small gasps and whines spurred him forward, lifting the smaller with ease, giving him time to adjust before biting down on his collar bone.   
“God. God oh my God”  
“You can still call me James mate. It’s cool”  
“Shut the fuck up and kiss me”  
“Gladly.”  
~  
Alex hadn’t left, when he woke up. For some reason, that warmed James. He smiled softly, pulling Alex to his chest. His hair was mess, but he pushed it back to press a kiss to his forehead, savoring the moment. Pulling the blankets up further, James fell asleep again, satisfied with knowing that Alex was in his arms.   
~  
They’d been sneaking around for months now. Quick kisses in the halls when Will and George weren’t looking. Staying the night in each other’s flats then slipping back to their own in the early hours of the morning. And all the while James used his same excuse from so long ago, that secrets were normal. He’d repeat it when Alex would hesitate to hold his hand in public. He’d use it when Alex would send him texts only to delete them from his phone later on. He’d recite it to himself at night like a mantra, until he fell asleep in Alex’s bed.   
~  
Laying a heavy hand on Alex’s thigh under the table, James smirked slyly. The stutter in Alex’s words was almost impossible to notice, but it brought him immense joy. So he started sliding further up, fingers wrapped around Alex’s upper thigh, squeezing gently.   
“Alex mate, you okay?” Will looked at him quizzically, the change in Alex’s tone obvious now.   
“Y-y-yeah. Good.” His face was flushed a delicate pink, and he almost sighed in relief when James took up the story, thumb rubbing circles over Alex’s jeans all the while. That night when they were back at James’ and Alex was gasping softly underneath him, he made sure to press kisses into the skin of his thigh, pulling soft whines out of him.   
“James. James please. Stop teasin’ please. Did that enough ‘round the others.”  
“Didn’t hear you complaining.”  
“Ah j-just get on with it. Please.”  
And how could he refuse him when he asked like that?  
~  
“I think we should tell people we’re together.”  
James froze, water bottle pressed against his lips, but shock keeping him from taking a drink. He slowly lowered it on the nightstand, setting it down softly as though noise would scare Alex away.   
“Are you sure? I wouldn’t want to make you uncomfortable.”  
“I-I’m sure. I want them to know.”  
“Okay then. Let’s tell them.”  
~  
Letting their friends know about their relationship had seemed like such a huge step, a few weeks ago. But as James thought about it, hand gripping Alex’s, he supposed that secrets, no matter how normal, couldn’t be kept for that long.

**Author's Note:**

> Thanks for reading :)  
> {please don't show to anyone mentioned in this fic}


End file.
